Letting Go

[Mary Agnes Klee McNamara Strayer, July 24, 1933- July 8, 2016][

In the early hours of Friday morning, my Mom crossed over.  Living with Alzheimers for 10 years offered us opportunity to grieve the bits of her that left as her memory eroded, but what became so clear to me in the 10 days leading to her death, was that her truest self was still present. Her essence remained until the end-- full of love, grace, respect, gratitude, inner peace, beauty, humor, and compassion.  Every person that came into the room shared the ways that Mom had shown love and kindness to them, from family and friends, to the nurses, aids, kitchen staff, and front desk employees where she lived.  And she embodied that her entire life, always giving of herself, finding ways to help those in need, and offering nurturance through coffee, baking, art, hand-written notes, prayers, playing the piano, tending her beloved kitties, and offering her gentle touch.  

Mama was a powerful role model in so many profound ways.  She showed tremendous strength and courage in raising 8 of us after my dad died when she was 40, a living example that you can do what you need to do, even when it is difficult beyond words, and unchartered territory. She showed much perserverence and patience in many parts of her life, while maintaining a sense of love and optimism for those she loved.  She truly was a warrior woman in her own quiet and humble (understatement!) ways.  

Another gift she shared abundantly was her art.  She was an amazing artist, and expressed it in so many ways.  She made all of her children quilts, and drew birthday signs that she would post around the house to discover as we awoke.  She painted and drew and stitched her love through all of these years, and we were blessed and delighted to receive it.  Mama used her creativity in a myriad of ways, and nurtured this resourcefulness and artistic sense in all of us, a gift for which I will be eternally grateful.  She had an eye for color, and always pointed out the congruence of colors in our clothing, food, and nature.  Mom deeply appreciated nature, and was rejuvenated by the birds she faithfully fed, the flowers she tended, and the trees and sky she so often studied and reflected upon.  And she was so aware of the details that were easily passed over, pointing out the smallest of forms and reflections that were present in the natural world.  This is a shared connection that I will continue to cherish in my own life.  She carved out time to make her art, showing the importance of nurturing things in ourselves that need expression. 

Mama always got up before dawn to pray, listen to the birds sing the morning in, and have coffee, soaking up the precious quiet.   She said it gave her fortitude to face what the day might bring.   Besides being immersed in raising all of us, she was devoted to her volunteer work weekly with hospice, the prisons, soup kitchen, and nursing homes.  We often went with her to the nursing homes to visit, play the piano, and be with those who needed company.  She would bring fresh salad to one woman who loved her greens, and butterscotch candies to a man who would line them up across his whole tray in perfect order, before eating them one by one.  Mom taught us by example that all are worthy of love and respect and compassion, and that we always have something to offer each and every person we meet.  I am quite sure that it is this modeling that influenced me doing social work, my sisters being nurses, and in the many ways that we continue the care-taking that she shared with us.

I will so miss Mama's sense of humor.  She had a contagious smile and full laugh, and was quite easily amused.  She shared much silliness and playfullness with my boys, part of what they loved most about her-- she could be a kid right along with them, especially as the Alzheimers removed some of the layers of repression, connecting to her free-spiritedness.  She was up for adventures and outings to Goodwill and garage sales, always keeping her eye out for good finds.

She appreciated the simplest of things, from watermelon on a hot night, to Yardley's lavender soap, to a sweater to keep herself warm.  Mom taught us mindfulness without even knowing it.  I could write on and on about the ways she influenced us all and am keenly aware of what a profound gift her life has been to all those she touched.  We will carry her love forward, inspiring us to keep her spirit and goodness alive.   She will be profoundly missed, but is finally free.

Rest in peace, sweet Mama...

---

Excited to Announce

View fullsize

  This morning, I am so happy to announce that the NEW Spring 2016 Issue of Encaustic Arts is now available (For NEW subscribers, Click to Register Now! )  for online viewing.  I am so honored to be featured in this magazine, alongside 7 talented prominent encaustic artists.  

 Encaustic Arts Magazine is published online semi-annually by The Encaustic Art Institute. The first and only international magazine about encaustic, it features the most important news about the medium. Issues are filled with articles on encaustic/wax artists, info on techniques, tools, materials & exhibitions. Best of all, the magazine is FREE!  

Featured artists this issue: LARRY CALKINS, MICHELLE HAYDEN, KARL KAISER, JEFF SCHALLER, DIANNA SCHOMAKER, ELISE WAGNER and HOLLY WILSON. 

With this issue, we highlight a new TECHNIQUE feature article written by JERRY MCLAUGHLIN on cold wax medium. Artist MICHELLE HAYDEN's encaustic mixed media piece, Quiet Emergence is ourSpring 2016 cover (photo, Bob Bagley).

  Writing this article was a growthful and challenging experience for me, and I spent much time reflecting on what it is that inspires and drives me to make art, how I have come to love working with beeswax, and why this medium's ability to transform my work is so important.  I did much soul-searching on these sharings, and realized that presenting the wider angle is integral to who I am and to my art.  Living takes courage, as does sharing vulnerable parts of oneself, but I truly believe that it helps us all be more whole when we can share in this way... and it enables us to connect with each other, which surely is part of our purpose here on earth.  

  I immersed myself in reading the other artists' profiles and stories of how they came to be where they are, and soaked up their insight, experience, and beautiful photos of their work.  I was moved by the dedication to their art, and awed by their unique ways of expressing themselves through image and word.  I feel privileged to be featured with them, and thankful to have been exposed to their work.  

  I am especially grateful to the founders of Encaustic Art Institue, Douglas and Adrienne Mehrens, and editor, Kari Gorden, who put incredible time and effort into supporting encaustic artists worldwide, and in promoting artists through their magazine, gallery, and teaching.  Doug shared in his editorial comment of the magazine that people in over 29 countries across the world have opened this magazine, showing how the interest and love of encaustic is spreading. How exciting is that?

  I also wanted to share a new piece I just completed, which came together in a totally different way than I had anticipated, which is often the case.  It took me many hours of trying to make it work they way I had envisioned it, only to realize that I needed to see the resistance as a sign to change the whole form... and of course, when I let that happen, it all came together into a cohesive piece.  I then was able to enjoy the flow of making this vessel, and feel a sense of protectiveness about it, as if it is a rare seed pod found on the forest floor (quite a large one!).  

View fullsize

"Propagate", (13 x 17 x 11 inches), 2016

View fullsize

View fullsize

  Once again, I conclude with offering much appreciation for the love of my family, friends, and fellow artists, whose  interchange of support, inspiration, and encouragement makes it possible to express our lives in so many ways.  Being part of this tribe is such a privilege...

---

Seasons

View fullsize

"Held by the Light", photograph of pod, 2016

I have been reflecting much on the seasons of life these past several weeks… how quickly they change from one to the other, what gifts and challenges they bring, and how some are easier to embrace than others.  This spring has brought a fresh round of color, fragrances, and a bursting of new growth in all forms, and it has also brought loss—of several full-of-life people in our small community and family, and of the decline of my mama.  Our family brought hospice in a few days ago to ensure that she leave this world with the utmost care, quality of life, dignity, and profound tenderness and love surrounding her.  I am incredibly grateful that hospice is able to assist us in keeping her comfortable, and helping her ease out of the long years that she has suffered with Alzheimers.  We have been losing her a bit at a time over these years, and yet, it is so difficult to take in that we are at this point of letting go.   Mama has been a tough bird, raising us all with as much love and strength as she could muster.

As I walked during sunrise the other day, I gathered several treasures off the ground.  Found were a remnant of a wren eggshell, whose small bird is likely growing feathers on its newly sprouted wings, fragments of cedar wood that will hold new sculpture, tulip tree blossoms in different states of disintegration, two large feathers of birds long flown over, birch bark calling for imagery on its smooth surface, a perfectly whole robin egg that left its nest too early, and an amazing large pod that had seeds releasing from its core.  My pockets and mind were full as I pondered how this wheel of life is a constant in nature and in our own existence.  I felt both a sense of comfort and helplessness in this, aware that things happen in their own time, and that this does not always correspond with our being ready to let go.  And I reminded myself that it is important to just breathe that in, and keep breathing, holding that acceptance gently.  A second morning as I was out before dawn, a shooting star went over my head, lighting up the dark sky.  I burst into tears, feeling how fleeting life can be-- and then minutes later, another streaked through the wide open sky… and reminded me to connect with the fullness and offerings that these experiences bring, as well as the day that lies before me.

View fullsize

"Release", photograph, encaustic carving, 2016

I know that the sadness comes out of having loved deeply, and that this in itself, is a profound blessing.  Like the pod that is slowly freeing its seeds to be carried by the wind, so we must surrender, trusting that my mama will experience liberation from her earthly body and mind, and that the seeds she has planted in all those she loves will continue to bear the many gifts she has shared with us.  And all of these losses, always, deep reminders to love each other more fully, including ourselves…

View fullsize

"Spectrum of Life", photograph, 2016

---

Back in the Flow

I am elated to be able to share that we wrapped up the main work from our fire, and that my in-house studio space is back up and running.  This brings me incredible joy, and relief beyond words, and I am so deeply grateful to be making art again.  The first piece to share is the result of a meditative exercise in which I let my mind be free of expectation of what was to emerge, and to let my hands bring the imagery into dimension.  I worked in silence to let my mind be clear, and enjoyed the process of letting the colors flow from many layers of drawing and painting into new form.  I really enjoyed working in this way, and will be exploring more like this in the future...

"Patterns in my Mind", (13 x 18 x 4.25 inches), 2016

The next sculpture came about after many hours visiting a grocery that carried food from around the world (made much more fun and interesting with the company of a dear old friend).  I paused frequently to marvel at cuisine so different from my own.  Coming upon these large cacti leaves (spines removed), I reflected on the sustenance they held... guarded treasure stored beneath their once-spiny exteriors.  Like the life-saving water contained within, we also have inner resources to call on in times of need. Connecting with these parallels that lie within the natural world makes me feel more grounded in our shared world.

"Inner Resources", (13 x 18 x 8.5 inches), 2016

The third piece  was inspired by a stand of yellow wildflowers growing in one of my favorite nature preserves.  I was struck by how the flowers seemed to reach up to touch the sky, especially when viewed from the perspective of the ground.  The contrast of the yellow and blue made such a beautiful balance, and seemed to be singing out the innate drive to embrace life in whatever ways we can.  

"Touch the Sky", (12 x 26.5 x 5.5), 2016

Once again, I feel so fortunate to have art as an outlet, and this forum as a way to share it with others.  Much appreciation is felt in the power of connection that comes from this interchange.

---

New Light

View of the most breath-taking rainbow I have ever seen, taken on our land

  Thursday, I received some lovely news.  The International Encaustic Artists organization notified me that I have been granted a 2016 Emerging Artist Award.  I am deeply honored to receive this recognition and financial support, especially as I am just in the early stages of introducing my work.  I am looking forward to using the funding to explore work on a hot box, whose surface allows for monoprints and painting.  These prints will become sculptures, as well as foundational backgrounds for my sculptural work.  I can hardly wait to begin new exploration with this limitless medium.  I am deeply grateful to the IEA for providing ongoing exposure and education on the encaustic arts, for supporting encaustic artists around the world, and for offering me this gift.  

  Friday, I was greeted with more positive news.  I am going to be a featured artist for the upcoming biannual issue of Encaustic Arts, an online magazine produced by the national encaustic organization,  Encaustic Art Institute, located in Sante Fe, NM.  To my surprise,  I was notified that one of my sculptures, "Quiet Emergence", was chosen for the cover of the magazine.  I am proud to be featured alongside these established and talented artists, and am looking so forward to reading all of their stories and profiles. The magazine will be available June 1st.   Here is a sneek peek of the cover...

It is so exciting that things are evolving as this new year unfolds, and I feel so privileged to be able to continue making and sharing my process and path.  Thank you for all of your support and interest.  It means the world.

Do these clouds not look like an oil painting?  I did nothing to modify the picture.   Amazing!

I love when nature reflects what emotions I am feeling, and could not have created a more perfect transition from  cleansing storms to (double!) rainbow to some of the most beautiful skies I have ever seen... such a gift!

Night Out with the Arts

View fullsize

 Last Saturday, February 27, I had the privilege of attending the Berea Art Council's 2016 Stepping Out for the Arts.  The theme this year was, "Through the Looking Glass", and the costumes, decorations, and multitude of cupcakes depicted all kinds of wonderful Alice in Wonderland imagery... there were papier mache mushrooms and collections of teacups on the tables, crazy and eccentric hats, and much levity and excitement in the air.    There was both a silent auction and a live auction, led by the talented Rev. Kent Gilbert, and he brought much laughter and momentous energy to the bidding for the beautiful art.   The space was again a stunning venue, and the West family who owns this amazing space has done a fantastic job of preserving and furthering the beauty of this historic building, as well as providing flawless service throughout the evening.  

And this is the thing which struck me most as I absorbed the evening, taking in the 96+ pieces of artwork (click to see gallery) donated by local artists and conversing with so many-- that I am so incredibly fortunate to be surrounded by a deep and wide community of creative, supportive, generous folk.  I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude to be part of this lively and loving group, bursting at the seams with talent of all kinds... and aware of the amount of time and resources that went in to making the evening such a success.  I want to send out a huge thank you to all of the artists, volunteers, sponsors, friends and family who came out to support the Berea Arts Council, and especially to the BAC for supporting me as an artist over the past 10 years.  It was palpable, the good energy that swirled around.

A final highlight of the evening for me was to be able to meet and engage with the woman who bought my piece, Lila Bellando.  Although I have been in Berea for 10 years, I had not yet had the chance to meet and know Lila, her husband, Richard, and daughter, Tara, as well as their 2 lovely friends.  Being the previous owners of Churchill Weavers, and Lila being an artist herself (as well as being the Director of the Berea Craft Festival for 32 years!), it was wonderful to hear about their history and impact on the arts in Berea and KY over a lifetime of dedication to the arts.   I felt honored that Lila purchased my piece, "Quiet Emergence", and look forward to getting together with her again and hearing more about her inspiring life.  It makes such a difference to get to meet the people who bring your art into their lives...  always a gift for me, validating this connection that is at the root of making and sharing art.  

Moving In with the New...

  The other day I received word that the piece I submitted to the Kentucky Art Council's "This is Fifty" Exhibit was accepted into the show.  This exhibit is part of the 50 year celebration for the KY Art Council's amazing support to artists in KY in the past 50 years, as well as looking forward to how the next 50 will evolve.   I am so thrilled to be part of this show, which will showcase the many literal, figurative,and metaphorical interpretations of artists to the theme, "fifty".  Here was my take on the subject, both in and image and word...

View fullsize

"At the Stillpoint"

 

 "I found this sea urchin on a specimen shelf in a university biology building.  Long since removed from the ocean, its mission now is to serve as an object of study for science students.  I was taken by the beauty found in the reflection in the glass on which it rested, and realized that this was as meaningful as the urchin, itself.  I pondered the calcified remains of this dear creature, and how the opening in this vessel seemed to invite me in, beckoning further exploration.  Likewise, I pondered about our outer bodies, the ways in which we age, and how we often become more introspective as the years of our lives go by… and if we are lucky enough to have made it to the fifty year mark, how we both reflect on what has transpired in our lives, as well as wonder how our lives will evolve in the second half of a century of living.  This simple image holds powerful symbolism, reminding me to grow inwardly as intentionally as I tend to my outward physical body, and to balance energies, within and without, as part of daily mindfulness.  With gratitude for all of the paths that have taken me here, I am reminded to honor both the new unfoldings as well as the losses that have been integral in the making of who I am, and to work hard to share the outgrowth in a way that will be passed on to my children and to those whom I touched in my time on earth.

  The underlying photograph is covered with many layers of beeswax and resin of African trees, and then hand-colored with powdered pigment.  This process of layering wax and color reflects the many layers by which we all are made, and makes me appreciate how the build-up makes a more beautiful surface than the photograph alone, and transmits a fuller depth.  Each layer must be fused with heat to the layer beneath, merging into a whole that can no longer be separated.  Batik dots, which mark where once stood defensive spines, remind that we, like the sea urchin, have elements which reflexively ward off all that we perceive (or misperceive) as threatening.  Without needless defense, the true self emerges."

 

This exhibit will be showing at Kentucky Crafted: The Market, from March 4-6, held at the Lexington Convention Center.  It is such a creative way of celebrating the 50th anniversary of this wonderful organization, and I look forward to seeing all the many interpretations of this word.  Please stop by if you are in the area and see the exhibit while enjoying the market!   Thank you for letting me share!

And a Week Until Close...

As rain now follows the snow that fell yesterday, I sit here wondering where this past month has gone.  It is hard to believe that we are in the final week of “Turn Up the Heat” at Mary Rezny’s Gallery in Lexington, KY.  It is up until Saturday… so there is still the rest of the week to see it if you have not had a chance already.  And I am finally able to share about the opening, which was a wonderful event.

The evening was full of cold rain, yet many still came out to see the work, and I really enjoyed being able to talk at length with many of the artists as well as gallery hoppers.  It means a great deal to have these face to face sharings about the work I do, and to hear about that of others.  It adds such a different element to just seeing the work up on the wall… an extra depth, which is lovely.   You really can get a sense of the underlying energy of the artists, as well as how the viewers experience the pieces.  It reminds me of dots being connected, making a more complete image.  Super exciting, and so grateful I was able to be there.   I was very sorry that Melissa Hall, Bridgette Guerzon-Mills, and Trish O’Brien Korte were not able to attend.  I would have really enjoyed hearing about your technique, inspiration, and stories… and you were there in spirit!   There was much engagement with your work, and I tried to capture some of it through photos.    All of the work was beautiful, and I found it to be a really cohesive, yet diverse, show.  Here are many images from the evening…  

The gallery below shows the work of artist Raymond Papka, and of his engaging conversations in explaining how he works...

This next gallery shares the work of artist Trish Korte.  I look forward to talking to her in person about her sculptural work!

This gallery is the work of artist Melissa Hall, whom I also look forward to catching up with!

Artist Bridgette Guerzon Mills' works follows below... hoping to cross paths in person some day, Bridgette!

And last but not least, the work of artist Debbie Jackson Billips...

Thank you all for whatever part you had in supporting this amazing show... whether it was organizing and curating the show, (Mary Rezny!), making the artwork that became part of the cohesive whole, were the friends and supporters who came out to appreciate and share in the show, or our dear families,  who pulled more weight and ate a lot of cereal for dinner in the months preceding this show (thanks, boys!) :).  Words hardly seem adequate to express the gratitude and of being supported and encouraged as an artist, especially when the really difficult parts are the focus of the day.  It makes me feel very loved and very privileged to be able to share in this experience with all of you, no  matter where you fit in from that mix.  Hugs to you all... 

Finally Catching Up

  As I am taking stock of how much has transpired in the last several months, it feels great to be wrapping up a bit of review.  In the midst of trying to get our feet back on the ground after the fire, as well as preparing for the "Turn Up the Heat" exhibit at the MS Rezny Gallery in Lexington (which closes this Friday!), I received an invitation from fellow artist and friend, Kathleen O'Brien, to apply for submission into the "Kentucky Visions at the Capitol:  Fifty/50" exhibit.  The KY Art Council is celebrating 50 years of supporting the arts in KY by showcasing 50 artists who have either been KY Crafted artists or Al Smith Fellowship recipients (Kathleen has been both!) in the past 50 years, as well as 50 new artists, nominated by those already involved in the KY Art Council in the previous half a century (doesn't that sound dramatic?... I could not write the number "50" one more time in the same sentence :)) .  I am honored to exhibit with Kathleen and the other 98 artists, and so happy to be accepted into this show.  In it, the KY Art Council is honoring the past, as well as anticipating what will evolve in the next 50 years in the Council.  This exhibit is showcased in the Kentucky Capitol Annex, Frankfort, KY.  It will run for the duration of the legislative session, and opened on January 5, 2016, and will continue until April 22, 2016.  

Sadly, I was not able to attend Arts Day at the capitol, on January 20, due to snow, which kept us snuggled up at home on the top of a very long hill. Kathleen had 2 pieces accepted, as did I, and here are pictures of my pieces below.  You can see an album of the 100 pieces in the show at this link to the KY Art Council page.

"While the Sun Was Rising", encaustic, photography, pigment

This piece was made from a photograph that I took one morning while doing yoga during a clear and still sunrise.  Out of nowhere, a massive series of storm clouds appeared from the north, and I was completely taken in by what evolved in the next 20 minutes.  The sky changed in such rapid fashion that I could think of nothing else, and was drawn into the power of nature, and of its force and ability to overtake any moment.  Although a funnel cloud developed and started to drop down shortly after this picture was taken, it was quickly reabsorbed into the surrounding configurations.  I felt such gratitude to witness to this breath-taking beauty, as well as to be safe.  I pondered how nature mirrors our own lives, which can change on a dime, and how we can use these metaphors for inspiration, validation, and comfort when our own circumstances need balancing.  

The photograph was mounted to a panel, covered with multiple layers of wax, and then further interpreted through many drawn layers of powdered pigment/Pan Pastels, which were fused between applications.  As I worked on it, I thought of the many who have been affected by intense weather (literal and figurative), and how I wished for sunrise to come once again for them as they find various ways to recover.  I am so grateful for the practice of art, which enables such contemplative practice...

"Seasons of Life",  encaustic, macro photography, pigment

This is the largest piece I have yet made, and the first in which I incorporated encaustic sculpture into a 2D panel.  I worked with collaging multiple images of my macro photography, coating them all with many layers of encaustic, hand-coloring them, carving relief work, and then fusing them into the overall composition.  The pinecone, tree, chrysalis, and butterfly weed all protude out of the panel in many directions, adding a new depth of interest.   This idea struck me well into the making of the piece, making it very challenging, as I had to take a razor blade to composition that was already fused down, and remove it in order to sculpt it and fuse again.  At some point, I had to stop myself from excising each image in the collage, realizing that enough was enough :).  That is the nature of experimentation and progression with any piece, eh?  It is always hard for me to stop, knowing that a work is ready to come to a resting place.  

  The symbolism in the piece is salient for me, as I am reflecting on the many stages of my own life right now while raising our 2 boys, witnessing my mother continue to decline with her Alzheimer's, and taking stock of the many stages in life related to letting go, bringing in new energy, and incubating that which is yet to come.  Time seems to be going by so quickly, and I am reminded by the stillness of the butterflies in this image to be present for what is happening in each moment as often as I can remember, while trusting that new growth continues to develop all the while.

  A couple of other new pieces I have been working on are below, and I wanted to share them while I am catching up in this post...

"Potential Awaits", macro photography, encaustic, pigment

This is the second panel piece I made which incorporates sculptural work, and this time, it was planned from the beginning :).  There is much detail drawn into the opening buds with colored pencil, and the background was covered with almost 1/4" of beeswax (that is a lot of layers!), and then hand-carved in an organic and intensive process.  I love carving this way, even though my wrists do not! The ensuing lines remind me very much of wood-cuts, of which I have always had an affinity.  I am always moved by elements in a piece that show the journey of the making.  It reminds me of how our lives unfold, and how we travel many different paths that lead to who we are, uniting to make us more whole and deep.  The buds were taken in late February of last year, at a wonderful nature preserve in Berea, KY, Anglin Falls, which is one very magical place...

"Sacred", encaustic, macro photography, pigment

Detail of "Sacred"... it is difficult to see in the previous image, and has such a luminous quality up close...

This was the first experimentation with hand-carving the background.  I love the flow which emerges as the carving unfolds, as it seemed like a good background for such a frozen moment in time.  I found this luna moth in my driveway one morning after an early pre-dawn run, outlined by the soft light of the street lamp.  I was surprised she was still there, not having been consumed by the night creatures that often use the lure of light which draws many winged ones in the dark of night.  The luna is such a divine-looking moth, and I am always reminded of the fleeting beauty in life when I come upon them, as they live for only 5 days. It makes me reflect on how I would live if I knew that was the amount of time I had to exist on this plane.   I so appreciate that photography exists to enable the preservation of these moments and experiences in time.

  Well, if you are still with me in this long post, congratulations :).  I feel so happy to be able to complete this re-cap, as it has been a long time in the making (thus, the long post!).   Stay tuned for an entry on the opening for "Turn Up the Heat", which is waiting in the eaves for wifi availability tomorrow, so that I can upload a large photo album.  And now to sit and breathe and enjoy the heavily falling snow...

New Exhibit! "Turn Up the Heat"

I am so very happy to announce the upcoming opening of the encaustic invitational, "Turn Up the Heat", at the Mary Rezny Gallery in Lexington, KY.  I was invited to participate in this show with five other artists--  Debbie Jackson Billips, Melissa T. Hall, Trish Korte, Bridgette Guerzon Mills, and Raymond Papka, and am thrilled to be part of this talented group of artists who demonstrate a wide range of artistry through this ancient and contemporary art form.  The exhibit opens this Tuesday, January 12, and runs through February 20.  There is an artist reception this Friday, January 15, from 5-8 p.m., as part of the Gallery Hop, and if you are in the area, it would be lovely to see you in person!

I enthusiastically embraced the invitation to be part of this exhibit on the morning of the fire. Because we were displaced from our home and were in major coping mode, creating the work became both challenging and healing.  I owe much gratitude to my spouse and young sons for their patience, support, and understanding, as creating the sculptures for this show absorbed much of my time and energy.  To say that I felt relief in completing the pieces and bringing them  to the gallery last week would be the understatement of the year ;),    I am incredibly thankful to have had the opportunity to create a new body of work, especially under the circumstances, and feel so happy that this experience helped me get back in the saddle.

"Dive Deep" (12 x 14 x 5)  (Macro photo of a parrot that sat on my lap at the zoo, "transformed" into sea creature...  this is a pedestal piece).

"What I Found in the Tidepool" (27 x 18 x 7)   (Macro photo of nautilus shell from nearby nature preserve, mounted on wood from our land which was found by my son... this piece can either be hung on the wall, or placed on a pedestal).

"The Sacred in the Night" (25 x 14 x 12)   (Macro photo of a luna moth discovered on the ground in the pre-dawn light, swarming on a globe made from beeswax-layered mulberry paper, lighted by LED light internally, and mounted on wood from our land... This is a pedestal piece).

"Vessels Are We"  (18 x 23 x 19)   (Hand-sculpted mulberry paper infused with many layers of beeswax, adorned with encaustic paint bead-like droplets, and embellished with wire "branches").

"Alive in the Flow"  (13 x 59 x 5)   (Multiple pods created from macro photography of the outer and underside of the Common Blue Morpho Butterfly wings, nestled in tree roots which became dislodged in a recent flood... this piece is a wall hanging).

"Beauty and Protection"   (16 x 10 x 9)   (Macro photography of Common Blue Morpho, mounted on wood found on our land... This is a pedestal piece).

With the exception of the vessel, all pieces originated with a photo that was colored, layered with many layers of wax, cut, hand-sculpted, carved, embellished,  and colored again before being incorporated into the forms which would hold them... as this is a very labor-intensive process, each piece holds around 100 hours of work.  This gave me much time for mindfulness about the miracle of being alive and having the privilege to create.  It gives me great joy to be able to share these pieces with you...  Thank you for being along for the journey!

Another Way of Keeping a Diary, Part II

  I begin where I last left off, anticipating that my sculpture for this exhibit, "Another Way of Keeping a Diary", was awaiting placement on the pedestal for the opening on Friday, November 20, 2015.  I woke up the preceding Thursday morning to an email from one of the curators and artists for the exhibit, Flo Bartell, explaining in the kindest way that she could, that my sculpture actually suffered severe damage, and that she attempted to fix it the best that she could, but that she did not know how the repairs would hold.    Four of six luna moths had become detached, many were cracked, and one was missing a tail, the branch was completely disconnected, and many thorns had been broken or removed.   After some deep breaths of acceptance, I went about my day, dismayed as I was.  After lunch, I received a voicemail from my dear and supportive spouse, encouraging me to consider flying out to fix the sculpture.  After intense deliberation,  I quickly booked a plane and flew out the next day, arriving 14 hours and 3 planes after take-off.   I was picked up from the airport late at night, given a lovely bed and use of private encaustic studio, and provided with much encouragementc, French press coffee, and early breakfast by the most welcoming couple-- Flo and her husband, Dr. Gary Bartell.  There was another artist in the exhibit, Mira White, who was staying with Flo, and she graciously shared her bedroom accomodations with me.   I  felt so nurtured, and trusted that the Universe was providing me with as much support as possible to restore the piece (yet again!).  

Flo Bartell beside one of her pieces selected for the exhibit...

Mira M. White, next to her piece in the show...

I awoke at 4:30 a.m., and began the 6 hours of intensive repair to rebuild the sculpture.  I did much perspiring during those hours, hearing the ticking of the clock as the reception opening hour approached.  I reflected on how resilient we humans are, and how we just have to step up to whatever things happen in our life, and do the best we can to make it through.  It was such a strange mix of fear of not being able to complete it, and such challenge to finish it even stronger than before. Thankfully, my hands remained steady and my intentions could not have been more clear, and it was, indeed, completed!  I kept 2 fingers on it for the entire transport to the San Luis Obispo Museum of Art, where I placed it on the pedestal 40 minutes before the juror and artist , David Limrite, arrived to spend time with the pieces before doing his presentation for the opening.  Never have I been so relieved to literally step away from a piece I have made!  And then I took many deep breaths of relief...

Wonderment at seeing my sculpture restored and on pedestal, as if no worse for the wear...

Standing with David in a cloud of great relief and gratitude to be there together...

  The most wondrous thing about the whole experience is that by having my sculpture arrive destroyed, a window opened for me to go out and be part of one of the most amazing experiences of my life.  I was able to meet many talented artists and view a wide range of beautiful work in person, and to share stories of what brought them to work with the incredible medium of encaustic in such diverse ways, the meaning of their pieces, and bits of life histories.  I was also able to connect further with David Limrite to process the unbelievable journey that evolved throughout the creation of this piece, and to share some of the profound gifts it has brought.   After the opening, I had the opportunity to join the International Encaustic Artists board members,  David and his wife, Jordan, and Flo and Mira for a delicious dinner at an authentic Italian restaurant... it was a lovely ending to one of the most magical days of my life.  I flew out the next morning after dear Flo drove me to the airport at 5a, and had one experience after another where kindness unfolded, despite it being the weekend prior to Thanksgiving, which challenged my inexperienced travel skills to their depths.  It was fascinating, and left me with so much evidence of what happened as a result of letting in what was offered to me... the gift of going out to repair that which was broken.  I can't imagine it getting any more profound than that, or any more joyful.  Lucky me. 

"Life Events"

According to insurance terms, we have sadly experienced a “life event”.  Six weeks ago, we had a house fire, which resulted from my encaustic wax being accidentally left on when we left for the day, somehow igniting, and emitting black acrid smoke which damaged much of the contents of our house.  We found all 4 of our cats alive hours later, with incredible relief and gratitude that no living being was harmed from the fire.  We spent 5 weeks with family, and learned much about sharing space, vulnerability, coping, and receiving help.  There were incredible outpourings of compassionate care, offers of assistance on many levels, and a palpable feeling of being valued and loved.  These were the beautiful gifts that emerged in the midst of what has been terribly painful and raw. 

We have had the opportunity to simplify all that we own, having handled every single item in our home, deciding whether it was salvageable, would be cleaned by us, or put into the hands of the fire restoration crew to clean.  Daunting and overwhelming, it was, and still is, honestly, as we are now moving back in to our home.  We have been brought to a new level of mindfulness as we are recreating our living space, as well as how we live day to day.   And we wish to offer much appreciation for all of those you helped lighten the load these last many weeks.  There are no words to adequately describe the depth of our thankfulness...

And the interesting thing that we quickly realized is that life continued where it left off the  week prior to the fire, almost as if nothing had changed.  It was an incredibly busy week leading up to the fire... in a matter of 24 hours, I submitted a collection of work for the Berea Library as Artist of the Month, showcasing 12 encaustic sculptures, which resulted in them being saved from the fire (as they were stored in the room where the fire took place).  I submitted a large encaustic sculpture for the International Encaustic Artists call for entry for their upcoming exhibit entitled, "Another Way of Keeping a Diary".  A few days later I watched as the Encaustic Art Institute's 5th Juried Encaustic/Wax Exhibition in Sante Fe, NM, as well as the Fertile Ground exhibit, in Berea, KY, both had their openings.   I was honored to be in these shows, and so excited by the energy of having been part of both of these exhibits.  I also turned 47 that week preceding the fire, and had commented that I usually did not remember many particular years of my life, but felt that this one was going to be significant...  

So I am off to a strong start in that category!  And life has continued on in some very good ways that help balance some of the intensity of the fire aftermath.  I was invited by Mary Rezny to participate in an encaustic invitational show of 5 artists this upcoming January, and readily accepted (the morning of the fire!).  I am honored to be part of this group of artists who are showing different expressions of what can be created through encaustic art.  It feels wonderful to be working on pieces that will be part of this show, and helps me to get back in the saddle :).  Stay tuned as I share some of the process as I create new work...

I was also thrilled to learn a week after the fire that my sculpture had been accepted into the International Encaustic Artists exhibit, which leads me to the announcement of its upcoming opening in only 2 days!  It will be showcased at the San Luis Obispo Museum of Art, in San Luis Obispo, CA.  The title of the show, "Another Way of Keeping a Diary", certainly called to me with my recent decision to outwardly share my healing process through art, and I began work on this piece in the summer.  I had a cow pelvis that had long been bleached by the sun that we found on our land, and knew long ago that the right opportunity would come along and call for it to be used.  I wanted to show holistically how our bodies hold trauma, grief, healing power, and liberation that comes from owning what we have lived through.  

Long before the fire, I had titled the piece, "Phoenix from the Flames", but felt self-conscious about naming it such a thing.  After much reflection, I called it, "Tear Bottle", and wrote about the history of tear bottles holding the grief of loss, as a sign of respect for that loss... and how acknowledging that loss and honoring it enables deeper healing to happen, and for new experiences to come out of what previously held trauma, like the miracles of my children that emerged from the same pelvis that experienced violation.   It felt empowering, although deeply painful, to place each thorn on the pelvis, and I did much tonglen meditation for all those who have known violence to their bodies, and for those who are experiencing it, still.  The work of creating this sculpture was deeply healing on so many levels, and became a sort of prayer and offering for hope and healing for all those who are in need.  It was cathartic on a level that is difficult to capture in words, but is something for which I will always be grateful.  

The morning of the fire, I actually moved the sculpture out of my studio and into the house, about 5 feet from where my wax caught on fire.  Fortunately, I covered it with a trash bag, to protect if from our cats nibbling on the branches, and quite fortunately, it melted it over the whole piece, protecting it from the spray of blackened wax, extinguisher spray, and hose water that exploded over the whole room.  I was able to carefully remove the bag and restore the sculpture after 8 hours of work.  The beeswax was an amazing protectant for the sculpture, and it did not absorb the acrid smell that consumed many of the materials in our house.  We aired it in the wind for many watchful days, and were so relieved that it remained intact.  I was able to have it shipped across the US via airplane, and it arrived and will be on a pedestal at the museum in a matter of days.

 I have reflected and wondered if the spirit of the cow who inhabited this pelvis knows of the amazing healing it has brought to me, or of the journey far from the hills of Kentucky that it has now taken, to be viewed by many.  I know it will leave me with a profound depth for as long as I live, and I am so very grateful to the International Encaustic Artists and to the San Luis Obispo Museum of Art for putting together such a powerful exhibit.  I owe special thanks to David Limrite, artist and juror for the show, who offered much encouragement for restoration of the piece, and tremendous validation of the power of my piece.   I am so grateful to have had his support during this time of exhaustion from coping with literally enabling this sculpture to be the "phoenix from the flames".  

Thank you for sharing in this process of life and creating with me.  There have been so many lessons about impermanence this past month, and I have had much opportunity to let go of things... pride, privacy, guilt, possessions, art supplies, and pieces of artwork damaged by the fire (to name but a few).  It has helped to reflect on each piece, be reminded of what it has taught me, and to release it in whatever way was needed.  And the process will be ongoing, as life is an ongoing experience of letting go and opening to the new that moves in...

Opening for NOT BIG (3) Exhibit

Friday evening, Mary Rezny of the Rezny Gallery hosted the opening for the not BIG (3) exhibit, and it was an evening full of energy, learning,  engagmement, gorgeous violin music (Brice Farrar), delicious food (thank you, Marco Logsdon, artist and wonderful cook).  I really enjoyed meeting the other artists, and hearing about their work, diverse and beautiful.  It is always lovely to make new connections, especially when they feel like old ones... 

Finally got to meet Kathleen O'Brien, artist and healer ... (and to the right, Mary Rezny (black shirt) and to her right, Nathan Zamarron, juror)

Ray Papka, beautiful encaustic assemblage piece... many more on his website-- check them out here!

The exhibit remains open until  September 11, so stop by and check it out if you get a chance... lots of amazing work to be seen.   I feel so grateful to my boys, who made it through the whole evening, and to Susan and Laurie, who made the trek up to see the exhibit.  Thank you, Mary and Nathan, for enabling me to be part of this exhibit... it has been a great experience, and I look forward to the positive energy from new connections made.

---

AUGUST 11, 2015

Today I am beginning my first blog post by sharing some fun news.  I am honored that my encaustic sculpture, "Quiet Emergence", was chosen to be included in the not BIG 3 Exhibit at the Mary Rezny Gallery.   I am really looking forward to seeing all of the work and to meeting the artists.  Below is more information on this exciting exhibit...

Regional, National, and International Artists Chosen as Finalists

M S Rezny Studio/Gallery is pleased to announce the finals in the national/international small arts juried competition notBIG(3) The Exhibit.  There was no intended theme for this art competition; the only requirement was that the artwork had to be 12”x12” or smaller, including the frame.  128 artists from 28 states and 6 countries submitted 380 artworks for consideration.  This year’s juror Nathan Zamarron, LexArts, Community Arts Manager, Lexington, selected 45 artworks to be in the exhibit.  “While looking through the works I saw a vast array of aesthetic and approach to art making.  The variety of media and subject matter made the selection process fun and engaging as well as challenging.”  Although the work may be small in size, it is big in content. 

M.S. Rezny Studio/Gallery     P.O. Box 4714     903 Manchester St.    Lexington       KY     40544     mail@msrezny.com       859 252 4647       

  Another thing for which I am grateful is that St. Joseph East of Lexington chose my 24" x 36" photograph/powdered pigment work, "Morning in the Garden" (below), to be part of their Healing Arts Initiative, in which they purchase work from artists in KY to be in the hospitals to promote a healing and calming environment for patients and their families.  During my years as a social worker in hospice, I experienced firsthand the need for imagery and symbolism that radiates positive energy for all who need care and work in that environment.  I applaud St. Joseph for providing the funding and commitment of time to make this a priority, and am thankful to have a small part in making the hospital a more healing environment.

  I would also like to thank Berea Arts Council and the Kentucky Guild of Artists and Craftsmen for showing my work.  You can find my photography at both galleries, and encaustic sculpture will be arriving there soon!

  I am so happy to announce that my website (michellehaydenfineart.com) is up and running, thanks to hours of assistance and support from Greg Schloemer and Billy Lakes.  These guys were awesome in their patience and knowledge, and really helped me bring my art website to fruition.  I would highly recommend their services to anyone in need of help with computer issues or building their own site.  You can find them here, at Sentinel Solutions.   Big thanks to both of these guys!

   I look forward to sharing updates about my art and process of making on this blog.  Thanks for coming along for the ride!  I love hearing from you, so please drop me a line if you feel so inclined...